I believe every heart has its tales to whisper. So does mine. And... I let it :)
Maybe, it will touch another heart, maybe your heart. And who knows? Maybe our hearts will have the chance to grow together...
The name you receive is Deva Priya, The Beloved of the Existence. This means of course you'll act like one...
These were the words I've been told when I received the sannyas name.
It's been one year since then and the energy of this name slowly began to manifest in my life. I started to feel Existence as the force surrounding me, supporting me, guiding me, inspiring me, teaching me, loving me...
I clearly felt I don't belong to a certain place so I can actually be anywhere. I belong to Existence and nature is where I feel at Home.
For the first time, I committed full hearted in being the Beloved. Not the friend, the buddy, the supporter, the carrier, but the Beloved.
I started to love life to its fullest. And life immediately responded me back, mirroring me the same.
After one year of consciously wearing this name, I love and I feel loved being present in the deepest, fullest, richest, most beautiful and fulfilled relationship from this life: the one with Existence!
Thank you from my open flowering loving heart!
Relatia cea mai profunda, mai deplina, mai bogata, mai frumoasa si implinitoare din aceasta viata
Numele pe care il primesti este Deva Priya, Iubita Existentei. Asta inseamna bineinteles sa te si porti asa...
Acestea au fost cuvintele care mi-au fost spuse cand am primit numele de sannyas.
A trecut un an de atunci si energia acestui nume a inceput sa se manifeste in viata mea. Am inceput sa simt Existenta ca fiind forta ce ma inconjoara, ma sprijina, ma ghideaza, ma inspira, ma invata, ma iubeste...
Am simtit clar ca nu apartin unui loc anume si ca pot fi oriunde. Pentru ca apartin Existentei si Natura este locul in care ma simt Acasa.
Pentru prima data, m-am implicat cu toata inima in a fi Iubita. Nu prietena, camarada, cea care sprijina, cea care poarta, ci Iubita.
Am inceput sa iubesc viata in intregul ei. Iar viata mi-a raspuns imediat, oglindindu-mi iubirea inapoi.
Dupa un an in care port constient acest nume, iubesc si ma simt iubita fiind prezenta in relatia cea mai profunda, mai deplina, mai bogata, mai frumoasa si implinitoare din aceasta viata: relatia cu Existenta!
Iti multumesc cu inima deschisa, infloritoare si iubitoare!
There's something flowing around my mind now and it's about selfishness in a relationship. Any kind of relationship.
Along the while, I've been told that using someone for your own good is selfish. And I believed it, until I learned about being responsible of your own life and that no one can use no one without his/her co-operation. If I feel I'm being used, it is so because I let it be. Then again, this is possible only when we do something cause we 'have to', most probably waiting for something in return, waiting for our turn to use the other. When that something doesn't show up and our turn doesn't come, we feel that it's not fair and that we've been used. Well, was it fair in the first place?? I wonder...
I also borrowed the thought that If you don't give, you're selfish. And if you receive, you're selfish as well. So it's always give, never receive. Until I learned that giving and receiving are indeed the same. That if I'm not receiving, in fact I'm not giving someone else the chance to also give, and that's selfish too. That only when you know the value of receiving, you know the real value of giving. And then, giving becomes a spontaneous act of generosity, not a bribe...
There's of course the famous When you think at yourself and you put yourself in the first place, that's selfishness. I believed this until... I've found myself. Cause really, how can you support someone if you never support yourself? If you don't know who you are? Or where you are? Who is the one supporting? No one, actually...
Then I thought that sharing with someone only the sad moments, the 'problems', the difficult times or the down moments and forgetting about the same someone when living times of happiness and moments of joy is selfish attitude. But then again, everyone has the right to choose who's sharing to and what.
The question that still remains here for me is... If you give someone the chance to support you in rough times, why would you take, to the same someone, the chance to rejoice for your moments of joy, to be happy for your happiness?
The moon is rising. Again. And again I find myself here, hearing the little voice inside softly telling me...
Hey, you've been caught in 'doing' lately. So much 'doing'. Stop. Breathe. Be. Listen to the trees, listen to the grass, listen the silence... Breathe with me for a while. Just breathe deeply.
So I stop. And breathe. Deeply. In silence. It's a coming home. No more thoughts running around like crazy, no worries, no questions. Inside, in that inner space, in my center, inside my heart, there is silence and peace. It's amazing how it comes to the surface. All it needs is a breath in deep enough to touch it and then, with the breathing out, it spreads to my whole being. And I feel whole again.
The moon, mysterious and silent, touches my heart with a smile. Heart smiles back :) And there's a thought coming in quickly, that she's just half now, she's not whole yet.
Gently, she says...
Though you see me as a half now, remember... I am always whole! Even when the sun is shining only on a part of me... I am still whole.
Thanking her for her kindness and for her answer, I promise myself that next time when I'll think of someone he's just half now, I'll remember that it is just the way I see him, not the way he really is.
It might be that sometimes we are showing only a part of us, but in fact, we are always whole!
De vorba cu Luna
Creste luna. Iar. Si iar ma gasesc aici, auzind vocea aceea delicata soptindu-mi usor...
Hei, ai tot 'facut' in ultima vreme. Atat de multe de 'facut'. Opreste-te. Respira. Fii. Asculta copacii, asculta iarba, asculta linistea... Respira cu mine pentru o vreme. Doar respira adanc.
Asa ca ma opresc. Si respir. Adanc. In liniste. E ca o venire acasa. Fara ganduri care alearga ca nebunele, fara griji, fara intrebari. Inauntru, in acel spatiu interior, in centrul meu, in inima, este liniste si pace. E uimitor cum iese la suprafata. Tot ce are nevoie este o inspiratie destul de adanca incat sa atinga acest spatiu, iar apoi, odata cu expiratia, se raspandeste peste tot. Si ma simt intreaga iar.
Luna, misterioasa si tacuta, imi atinge inima cu un zambet. Inima-i zambeste si ea :) Si apare un gand, rapid, ca este doar jumatate acum, nu-i intreaga inca.
Bland, imi spune...
Cu toate ca ma vezi ca pe o jumatate acum, aminteste-ti... sunt intotdeauna intreaga! Chiar si cand soarele imi lumineaza doar o parte din mine... tot intreaga sunt.
Ii multumesc pentru bunatate si pentru raspuns si imi promit ca, data viitoare cand voi gandi despre cineva ca este doar jumatate acum, o sa-mi amintesc ca este doar felul in care eu il vad, nu felul in care este in realitate.
Poate ca, uneori, ne aratam doar o parte din noi, dar de fapt, suntem intotdeauna intregi!
I started to write because it was overflowing. Because I broke the wall of illusions around my heart and so I started to listen to her. I started to hear her whispers, her tales, her longings and joys.
I started to write simply because it pours out of my fingers. Because in this world we are mirrors for each other. Because what my heart heals, your heart heals too. Because I believe in the value of sharing. And giving.
What am I sharing here? Thoughts and sensations and sentiments. My ups and downs, my depths and highs. My longings and understandings and questions that come, stay and then go. Makings and unbindings, confusions and clarities, the wanders of my soul and its returnings Home. Poems, tales and words on life.
If you read this, thank you. If you don't, thank you still. If you share what you feel, I'm honored. If you don't, I respect your silence. I believe nothing in this life is simply randomly... Neither that I'm writing now, nor that you're reading now, neither you'll keep your thoughts unwritten, nor if you'll lay them here.
With love, Ram
Scrisoare de multumire
Am inceput sa scriu pentru ca dadea pe afara. Pentru ca mi-am frant zidul de iluzii ce-mi inconjura inima si asa am ajuns sa o ascult. Asa am inceput sa-i ascult soaptele, povestile, dorurile si bucuriile.
Am inceput sa scriu pur si simplu pentru ca imi curge prin degete. Pentru ca suntem in lumea asta oglinzi unul pentru celalalt. Pentru ca ceea ce vindeca inima mea, vindeca si a ta. Pentru ca eu cred in valoarea impartasirii. Si a daruirii.
Ce impartasesc aici? Ganduri si senzatii si sentimente. Susurile si josurile mele, profunzimile si inaltimile. Dorurile si intelegirele si intrebarile ce ma trec si ma petrec. Faceri si desfaceri, confuzii si claritati, hoinareli ale sufletului si intoarcerile Acasa. Poezii, povesti si vorbe despre viata.
De citesti, iti multumesc. De nu citesti, eu tot iti multumesc. De-mi impartasesti ce simti, sunt onorata. De nu-mi impartasesti, iti respect tacerea. Dar cred ca nimic din lumea asta nu este pur si simplu intamplator... Nici ca eu scriu acum, nici ca tu citesti acum, nici de-ti vei pastra gandurile nescrise, nici de le vei asterne aici.